Sunday 20th of October 2019


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2015-06-11 14:26:16 
Joined: 2015-06-10 05:13:53
Posts: 1
Location: Pretoria, South Africa

It's been almost two weeks since my boyfriend confessed to me that he has continued using ever since he got caught out months ago and promised he won't ever again. I know now that I was naive to believe that it was only once since he's got a history and I was naive to believe that he could stop again all on his own.


He has since found a sponsor/mentor and are attending NA meetings, getting involved in church and only hanging out with more positive influences.

I honestly don't know how a relationship can work out where he now has to focus on him only according to the program - which I understand..

I feel completely lost and alone.


Is there anyone out there who can offer me some encouragement, some words of advice or maybe share with me a success story?

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 Subject :Re: SUCCESS STORIES.. ANYONE??$$..
2015-06-13 12:18:43 
Joined: 2012-09-18 18:31:31
Posts: 32

Hi There.


Can share with you though that I too felt very much the same as you in the beginning. For me, this "One Day At A Time" was a major frustration as I just could not believe that he would only promise to be clean one day (at a time). It was only after when I got to see that for him, the promise to live without his fix 'forever' would constitute a lie, but the promise to live clean 'for that day' was an achievable goal. And with lots of gratitude, he stayed true to that.


Today, the addict in my life is clean for more than 8 years and it all came about through a commitment to just stay clean "One Day At A Time".


I was fixated with the addict and everything he did or did not do. What this ultimately did was to force him to not only live with his daily struggles but mine as well. When I learnt the value of releasing my addict with love and stopped obsessing about what his doing every day, I started the journey of looking after myself and allowing him to take care of his.


This was not an easy road at all, came with many pitfalls and plenty doubts whether I am doing the right thing or not. I attended Nar-Anon meetings regularly and this became my saving grace.  I could share my wavering levels of discomfort with those that have walked this unhappy road before; listen to there positive shares and find solace that for me, one day this too shall pass. And so it did.


It all happened slowly, at my pace of growth and in the time frame I was able to allocate to practicing the principles of the program in my life.


I strongly recommend you find your way to the Garsfontein meeting and attend as often as you can.


The Nar-Anon Program does work, but you have to be willing to work it.


Stay strong and take action.

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